Concert: Ballet Fiesta Mexicana

Friday June 29, 2007
7:00 pm - 9:00 pm

Windmuller Park
52-53 39th Drive
Woodside, NY

Presented by Woodside on the Move and the Thalia Spanish Theatre.

Queens Trusts This Painter/Contractor

After fiascos with both DIY efforts and the cheap-o pull-a-name-from-a-flyer-on-a-poll route, we spent a tiny bit of dough on a real painter. He usually does the uber-expensive faux-finishing that the 'others' dig so much, but he does just plain painting and carpentry as well.
Articulate, understanding, trustworthy and fast-
Brent Dickinson is all that and more.
When I'm rich, he'll be putting up "marble" everywhere in my digs.

He Rocks!

here's his email address:
brentdickinson-at-sprynet-dot-com

Tell him Queensrocks sent you. (We're trying to get in good for another room in the fall.)

Get In Line at El Triangulo

What could be better than having a few women call you 'guapo' or 'lindo' when you walk in to a restaurant?
Having them serve you strong coffee, bring you plates of food from a cheap buffet, and seating you next to a big, glorious window on Greenpoint Ave. to watch the Sunnysiders stroll by, that's what.

Super-friendly people. Super-sugary tea with lemon, and loads of just-oily-enough-but-still-fresh tasting traditional dishes that will leave you ready for a long walk through your great nabe.

Failed by Dolce Vita

This post was originally published a year ago, under the title "Dolce Vita Has Begun To Fight, Let Us Not Fail Them!"

Dolce Vita has undergone a radical transformation, and are no longer endorsed by this blog.

Men, and women I suppose, it is time to stand for what is right in Queens. It is time to stand and fight. Fight like dogs. Fight like cats. To fight like folks in search of a nice place to have a good cup of coffee and a crisp Italian cookie.

Allow me to tell you of Dolce Vita, a place where the battle is being fought. They are winning the war against corporate invasions. They are fighting the battles of grimy bathrooms and stale pastries. And, they are winning.

There's room to sit while you strategize your next move against the enemy - in these lovely, plush red settees.

Plot all you will, while nourished by some of the finest looking pastries and custom made cakes this side of Madison Ave. (Nita's is a close second on those cakes, she wins hands down on her donuts and coffee rings. But, we won't bring the Romanians into this - except to say that, have you noticed how much that one girl looks like Kirsten Dunst? I mean, in an Eastern European, I've been working since 4AM kind of way. But, still...)

Starbucks might burn one day. Soon. If all goes well.

These Fresh Pastries alone might kill other less satisfying pastries in the nabe, leaving us with little to do but pick up the bloody crumbs off of the floor of Aubergine and The Grind.

Oh, and the prices! Fantastic! $3 for a cappucino and free biscotti - Claire and I were given Pistachio with chocolate.

And the pastry chef sat with us while she made a birthday cake that was really quite amazing.

Mission Accomplished!

How To Run a Business Into The Grind

Remember when we wanted Starbuck's on Queens Boulevard to burn? I sure do. Remember too, when our first Mom-and-Pop coffee shop opened? It was called The Grind. Those were good times. We had a place to go to and a place to point a finger at.

Not so much anymore. We can still point at Starbuck's all we want and say that, even if hipster gentrification seems a ways off - corporate gentrification is at our door. But, Mom and Pop are letting us down as well.

The Grind is coming to a screeching, filthy, understocked halt. And, slowly, to boot.

Several recent visits have shown the place to be heading down the tubes - with slow service, dirty tables, no napkins, no coffee stirrers, no smiles, loud music, no change and no fresh pastry. Don't get me wrong - I like a place with some personality, and I'll still stop off at The Grind and suffer through to get the occasional coffee, but dang, man, if you're going to run a business that sells coffee, do it well and do it quick.

I give the place three months tops.

Sripraphai Don't Preach

Last weekend Wesley and I were blessed with a visit from two friends willing to make the trek from their chic digs on West 11th Street. Brave souls, they--the 7 train wasn't even running. So we picked them up at Courthouse Square and ferried them to Woodside for Thai at Sripaphai, one of the more well-known restaurants in Queens.

We easily found street parking, then endured a 20-minute wait for a table. Really not a big deal, as we were happily chatting and people watching. The downer came when we were seated--at the same exact moment as 5 other tables of four or more in our section. As a result, our service was glacial at best--one entree didn't arrive for over an hour after ordering.

Despite the delay upon delay, the food was astonishingly good. We started with shrimp dumplings, fried calamari, and chicken satay. I especially enjoyed the peanut sauce that came with the satay; it was a perfectly silky texture and had peanut flavor without making me want to reach for the jelly.

For entrees, we shared a pad thai that wasn't afraid of the dried shrimp (little pungent bits sprinkled throughout), sea bass in a lemongrass sauce that was hearty enough to be a soup, steamed chicken breast with basil sauce (presentation left something to be desired, but taste was supreme), and green curry with beef. The last was rich, smooth, with each of the flavor elements discernible yet harmonious. Dished up with coconut rice and the whole meal was a winner.

We retired back to chez Claire-Wesley for dessert: a chocolate mousse cake from Nita's and great conversation.

Sripaphai
7 train to 69th Street
Map

Thank you Queens Animal Hospital

This week has been a bit of a rollercoaster for Paul and I, as well as our dog. Sunday our 7 year old black lab-mix mysteriously transformed from his normal, bubbly, alert yet lazy self, into a drooling listless shadow of a dog.

As far as we knew he hadn't eaten anything out of the ordinary (including recalled food) nor had been in contact with any sick animals.

Queens Animal Hospital on Roosevelt Ave, quickly saw him, prescribed antibiotics and took blood. By the next day our pooch was worse, unable to even walk. He was hospitalized for the night with a very high temperature, but by the next day I was told to "PLEASE PICK HIM UP" as apparently our 4 footed lunatic had emerged from the dead and was driving the staff crazy. His appetite had returned and after not eating for nearly three days he was eating out them out of business!

They still do not know what it was, but suspect he just got the flu, so IV fluids and some medications were able to fix him right up.

So just wanted to give them props and a thank you for what a great and convenient help they've been for the 7 years I've been using them!

Before The Flood

Holy Crap are prices going up in Sunnyside. And this before the Historic District designation.

Just informal searching on my part, but it seems that 2 BR condos have gone from 265k to 340K in the last six months.

Check it out for yourself.

Thank the Lord for Rent Control.

Sheesh.

Quaint Ain't The Shaint

Ain't Donovan's got better burgers?
Hell yeah.
Quaint overcooks and oversalts.

Ain't Tournesol got better steak frites?
Hell yeah. Any damn day of the French Fuggin' Week. And without the mushroom sauce drowning the cow, needer.

Ain't the fish just as fresh at Ariyoshi?
I mean to tell ya what.

Fried fish ain't ever better than it is at Kettle.

And, I ain't got the time or the inclination for a waitress can't even tell me what fuggin' hummus is. That's not very special.

What is special? The waiter cleaning the table next to us with Windex while we ate.
Ain't that special?

Ain't it clean though.

At least it ain't Bliss, but ain't we got to have a better place to take our honeys on our one night off together? Ain't we?
I mean, really.
Shoot.

ps - I think we might have found a nice Subaru. Wish us luck.

Chicks Dig Fish on Dates While Fried is Just the Thing for the Men

What has happened with Bliss could have easily happened here at The Kettle nee The Copper Kettle. Turns out the price of heavy metals have risen so sharply, it's too costly even to keep 'Copper' in the name. Well, good thinking there boys, you might make it through another year yet. Especially with the coming demise of Bliss as foretold in these pages lo these many times.

There's nothing special about The Kettle, really. Another restaurant-meets-pub from central casting. Decent enough service, what they lack in skill they tend to make up for in obsequiousness. Not that that is a good thing or a fine standard.

Claire had the salmon, which was overcooked, but they always are at these places. Nary a restaurant east of Lex knows that salmon is best when it's rare. Sad that these poor creatures with mere decades left on their entire species lifespan can't get the respect they deserve. 2048 People! End of Sea food! Learn how to cook a Salmon.

Is it okay to send it back? Why, it's absolutely necessary.

And a burger. I've gone here for the fish and chips, but the size of the burger gets me every time. It's so beautiful. And, as such, it was this time too. But what my poor poor brain always neglects to tell me is that these motherfuggers don't carry nothing but coleman's mustard and gray poupon.
Can I get and ARRRRGH!? Give something Spicy brown. Not over powering. Even yellow. Something one can really glom on there.

Ugh. yeahitsgood. itsfinefine. dontworry. i'll eatit. iwill. thanks. salmonsfinetooshelovedit we'llbeback.

Some day soon I'm going to eat the shit out of Quaint and if those bastards don't make a fucking miracle and put it in front of me and all the glory of heaven doesn't envelope me in a loving mustard that is bitter but not overbearing, things will get ugly there.

Kettle -that's your name now. too mediocre to keep the 'The' , really. Keep up the b-level game. You'll live in this nabe as Bliss goes down.

Quaint, with that name and all this buzz, I'm coming in there and ordering the yogurt covered pizza with porcini and I'm sending it back, and when they come back to take my order once more,I will scream about the torture your father exacted on my father back in the old country that was just like this in every way, He would come in, my father, after having the salmon at La Taza and then sit down quietly here at Quaint.

Then the dance would begin. I watch and learned. I watched and I learned.

The Dance of The Nine Widows will not compare the the wailing sounds of Claire and Wesley should the burger at Quaint not , I repeat, not be better than all other burgers of our tiny villa.

good night and God Bless


ps-
anywone know where to buy a good used car?

One Day a Week is All Nita Asks

I posted previously on my failed attempt to get a donut from Nita's Bakery on Greenpoint Ave. They only sell them on Sunday.
Do you want to know why the only sell them on Sunday?
Because they kick motherfucking ass, that's why.

Hi, I'm Satan and This is My Home Depot

Hello, Queens. Satan here. Just wanted to let you know that I've opened up shop in Long Island City. It's a little place I like to call 'Home Depot.' Now, recently I've heard some grumblings about my humble shoppe, and I'd like to address these concerns now before things get out of hand and result in say, an angry torch-bearing mob ready to destroy every thing in it's path. We wouldn't want that, now would we? So, to wit, I offer my apologies and resolve to fix the following as soon as I am able to get away from this puppy mill.

The parking lot. My minions somehow managed to make entering hell, er Home Depot, a bit tricky. I assure you that they DID NOT intentionally design the lanes to go from one to two lanes, make one of those lanes a turn-only lane and the other too short to make a safe turn from. Why one lane stops in the middle of oncoming flow of traffic? I couldn't tell you. It makes no sense to me either. But, rest assured, we're working on it.

We are also making every effort to rid the lot of all the large, graffiti-covered moving trucks. We would also like to apologize that these trucks make it impossible to turn into the parking aisles without being able to see oncoming traffic. We did NOT intentionally make every turn blind. It simply isn't true. We're not EVIL, here. For cryin' out loud, people. I was an Angel at One Time!

As for the shopping carts. Or,as Tiffany From The Gardens likes to say, fingers up and arching ironically, "Shopping Carts". Do you think we don't KNOW that there's not any shopping carts? We know this. Any idiot can see that there's no "Shopping Carts", Tiffany. Then, why, do you ask, do my minions send you out into the parking lot to look for a "Shopping Cart" when they know you will find none? THEY'RE MINIONS! THIS IS WHAT THEY DO! Hello! Futile Efforts While We Laugh Quietly????? We wrote that book, Tiffany.

Wait. I'm sorry. I mean, we're getting more shopping carts. We want you to shop. We want you to buy many large-ticket items. Yes. We are getting more shopping carts. Real shopping carts. Without the locked wheels. And, we're going to have people - very concerned people - to help you with these large things. And, we'll have them push the carts out to your car and we'll put them in the car and these 'people' will wave while you drive away...

Where was I?
Oh, my Minions. I mean Associates.
Did you ever think that maybe they only look and act like they're not concerned? C'mon, people. Sometimes there's such a thing as irony. All you assholes, gentrifying the neighborhood and you think you're the only ones with a sense of irony. For cryin' out loud. My associates have worked very hard on their sense of irony and if it manifests itself in seemingly passive-aggressive behavior peppered with the occasional outburst of profanity directed at NO ONE IN PARTICULAR, then I think you should work with them on that.

Oh, and we're firing all of them anyway and replacing them with gentle souls who know where everything is and will help you find it.

But, we will continue to test for drugs.

And, as for the item(s) that you cannot find on every trip? It's out of stock, dude. Get used to it.

Fuck all of you.

I mean, have a nice day. Please come back soon.

Sunnyside Gardens Gets Gentrified The Old Fashioned Way

By getting 'Landmark' status...
Oh, brother

One of Our Own Takes the First Shot

When William Grimes was reviewing restaurants for the New York Times, he would conceal his identity when making a reservation by using the name, 'Ron DeFeo'. In case you didn't know, this is the name of the original Amityville murderer, upon whose story the book and subsequent movies were based. Ron woke up one night and murdered his entire family.

Now, in an act of murderous irony, Queen's own William Grimes is hastening the death of our dear borough, while, irony of ironies, lamenting it's loss.

Read it here , if you must.

Donuts or Bust - Nita's European Bakery.

Sunday mornings can be awesome. I don't think I really new how to appreciate a Sunday morning until I moved to New York. My old home town didn't have a brunch culture (also known as 'The Fisting'), didn't know how to spell New York Times, and revolved almost entirely around football and therefore booze.

But when J. from down the block told me about creme-filled donuts at The European Bakery on Greenpoint Ave., I knew Sunday's in Queens were about to get a lot better.

But, I'm having one of those weeks. Okay, ten day stretches. Hmm. Anyway, after dealing with some bidness over by the river this morning at 630 or so, I found myself outside this joint by 8. Earlier in the week I had gone in to scope out the place and bought what turned out to be damn fine - if small - muffins and a groovy little thing called a coffee ring. But, I was ready to dig on a donut. I NEEDED a donut.

Do you know who the Soup Nazi is? I used to work around the corner from Soup Kitchen International. It was good soup, made famous (better??) by being immortalized on an episode of Seinfeld. It wasn't too far from true. And, talk about a real - at least before the immortalization - New York Experience. There really is nothing like the desire for good food coupled with the trials to get it that will make New York eating, New York Eating.

Anyway, I ordered the donuts. I got, 'No donuts, today.' 'But, it's Sunday,' I countered. 'No donuts,' was all the response I could get.

So, if I'm up for it, and if God's willing, some time soon I'll be telling you about a creme-filled donut and a real New York experience. But for now, I'm just going to wolf down this crispy-on-the-outside-chewy-on-the-inside cinnamon roll and listen to Kristen Shaughnessy talk about the morning papers while I read the NYTimes online.
I love her. I love the Times. And, though I long for a donut, I love these cinnamon rolls.

NOTE: Nita's received a respectable 13 on it's last inspection.

The Aubergine Cafe

In the no-mans land smushed between Sunnyside and Woodside on 50th street and Skillman Avenue resides a gem of a cafe that has Paul and I going back again and again. The Aubergine cafe, which I believe is Irish owned and operated, features fresh coffee drinks, sandwiches, quiche, paninis, pastries, and salads.

Exposed brick lines one wall which also features newspapers and magazines that make ones' dentist office look under stocked. The small space is big on personality and flavorful food. A favorite of mine is the roasted red pepper, mozzarella, basil and olive tapanade sandwich and side salad. The quiche of the day are also delectable.

The only flaw we found in our latest trip, which is no fault of the establishment's, is the Park Slope nature of the clientele. On our latest Sunday afternoon jaunt we found the place to be filled with parents who couldn't care less that their toddling children were running around, screeching at the top of their lungs and at one point even banging on the glass of the pastry case. While we're all for family friendly dining, I wish that parents of rude children would realize that not everyone wants to be friends with their family!

So take a stroll to the outer limits of Sunnyside and partake of what the Aubergine has to offer, but if your kid is not well behaved, do us all a favor and get your coffee and sandwich to go!

(Photo credit: Paul Grove)